The XCiting Entry Syndrome
by AmandaArtiste
Summary: A crossover of the MIB movies and MIB: The Series. Agent X and Dr. Zeeltor are introduced with other series characters and Elle returns. Can they save the day?
1. The Silver Screen Meets Series Hit

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Disclaimer: I don't own MIB: The Series or MIB: The Movie(s). I'm sure I don't own the characters either, other than those not seen on either MIB media thingy. I do own this story and all my made up characters so please don't plagiarize or sue me. Feel free to review and enjoy the fiction!

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The X-Citing Entry Syndrome

Part One: The Silver Screen Meets Series Hit

A haze fell over New York City, residential home of several intergalactic species. Yes, mankind is not alone in this great universe. There are more than just frozen balls of dust zipping around out there amongst the twinkling stars dotting the bright heavens. People work, play, and live amongst the aliens in the city. Unaware of the vast races which surround them in their everyday lives. Men, women, children, and Neuralyzed agents exist oblivious to the fact that _we are not alone_.

One such example is ex-Agent Elle, now going by civilian name Laurel Weaver, morgue employee. She was returned to her civilian life after expressing a desire to return to a simpler way of thinking to her new partner, the Neuralyzer happy Agent Jay.

The Men In Black were soon to call her back though, Zed--the leader--was having his own share of problems. Too many cases, not enough agents. Thanks to Agent Jay and his overzealous desire to erase the memories of the 'unfit' employees.

Shuffling through a pile of papers on his desk Zed grumbled to himself about how out of hand things had gotten since the case with Serleena and The Light of Zartha. Pressing a button on his desk he waited a brief three seconds before a brown haired, over achieving agent, bustled in the door of his office.

"Sir, yes Sir?" Agent U saluted.

"Agent U," Zed began, "I'm assigning you to retrieval duty."

"Retrieval duty Sir?" U questioned.

"Yes," Zed nodded handing him a folder on the ex-agent Elle, "I want you to find this Neuralyzed agent and bring her in for deneuralyzation."

"Yes Sir," U saluted. "Shall I take Agent W on this assignment Sir?"

"I don't think that will be necessary son," Zed dismissed the matter with a wave of his hand, "You should be able to handle this one solo."

"Understood." U turned and eagerly started out the door.

"Oh and agent," Zed spoke up, U turned, "don't tell Agent Jay about this." he grinned imaging Jay's reaction once he found out that Elle was back, and probably with a vengeance.

"Right." U grinned and left the office.

Zed went back to the other folders on his desk. There was a new doctor coming in to take over the lab while he assigned Agent Elle an alien partner. Lyndon was always pestering him to hire an alien agent to better deal with the intergalactic public and now was as good a time as any to get the irritating ARC leader off his back. Besides, this new JeeDangian had quite an impressive resume, if you overlooked the suspensions.

"Dr. Zeeltor and Agent X," Zed said aloud to himself, "welcome to the MIB family."

******

Meanwhile across the city a blonde (previously a brunette with lighter hair due to a dye incident with a Nevain light ray) slumped down in her desk chair at the morgue. "I can't do this anymore." she sighed. A new victim had just been brought in, a three-year-old girl that needed an autopsy and it was Laurel's job to perform it. She couldn't bare the thought of carving up such an innocent little creature. And what was more, she suspected the child wasn't even human. There was a locket around her neck that flashed neon green whenever she had approached with the scalpel. Things were just getting way to weird for Laurel to do her job. And the demanding work was beginning to take it's toll on her.

Just then a man in a black suit with a military style haircut approached her. "Laurel Weaver?"

"Yes?"

"I'm Agent Utonian from the Institute of Medical Evaluation. I'm gonna have to ask you to come with me for a mental competency exam." U lied flashing his carte noir.

"You're joking right?" Laurel asked suspiciously. "I've never heard of this institution and quite frankly it sounds like a load of-"

"I assure you I'm quite serious. The establishment is new but you are required by state laws to undergo this test. Now if you'll just follow me." U insisted.

"Alright," Elle groaned, "it's not like I had anything better to do."

U lead the way pausing a moment when he passed by the child's body on the gurney, "Empress Liol, what a shame."

"Who?" Laurel asked checking the chart, "This says her name is May Walker."

"This way," U replied.

******

Back at the MIB transportation docks…

"My, what an exciting flight." a strange looking alien doctor/scientist remarked as he got off the transport followed by his traveling companion, a very smug JeeDangian who had complained the whole trip about being forced to sit next to an absolute moron.

"Are you kidding?" X snapped, "That was the worst trip of my life. And I can't believe I had to come all this way just to work for a bunch of pathetic little eared humans!"

"Come now Agent X," Zeeltor chuckled merrily, "it was an excellent trip. And the movie was so enlightening about the human culture."

"There was a man dressed in a giant turtle suit!" X growled, "I was ready to gouge my eyes out!"

"Greetings travelers," a perky female agent with a bun greeted the aliens, "if you'll please follow me to customs we'll check your bags and get your assignments ready."

"Perfect," X grumbled, "I can't wait to see what human reject I've gotten saddled with for a partner. Let's just hope he's a halfway decent public defender."

The agent, Agent Zora, smiled widely and led the two aliens along with a few others over to the front desk and helped them deposit their bags on the counter.

******

Laurel arrived at a strange looking building by the airport with Agent Utonian at around two o'clock that day and was taken straight to deneuralyzation. She passed through the main floor and was naturally surprised to see the variety of odd looking creatures scattered throughout the lobby.

"Is this some kind of science fiction convention?" she questioned spotting an odd pair standing at a custom's counter. The green alien with large pointy ears eyed her disdainfully.

"What are you lookin' at Little Ears?"

"Not much," she shot back as U pulled her own towards the appropriate room.

X huffed and turned back to make sure the desk clerk wasn't getting grubby opposable thumbprints all over his crystals.

"I think you like her," Zeeltor laughed.

"Shut up and mind your own business nutcase," X snarled.

Zeeltor laughed lightly and went back to collecting his beakers.

"Here we are," U stated as he pointed for Laurel to sit down in the deneuralyzer.

"This doesn't look like any piece of medical equipment that I've ever seen," she worried as U started the machine.

"That's because this isn't a piece of medical equipment," U answered, "The truth is, you're an ex-agent of a secret organization that monitors and polices all alien activity on Earth."

"What?" Laurel laughed.

"Why do you think the last few years of your life have been a complete blank?" U pointed out, "You're one of the proud, the few, the Men In Black."

"But I'm a woman," Laurel added just as the machine took effect.

"We named it before there were female agents," U rolled his eyes as Laurel's memories came flooding back to her.

The machine stopped a short while later and Laurel stared blankly at the opposite white wall. 

U cocked an eyebrow, walked over, and waved a hand in front of her face.

Blinking slowly Laurel looked up at the concerned agent, "W-where am I?"

"Welcome back to the MIB," U began, "Agent Elle."

******

The LTD pulled into the MIB parking garage with a very disheveled pair of agents. Agents Kay and Jay exited the vehicle and headed for the elevator. 

"Man, those Parsoosi immigrants get more violent every year," Agent Jay, the forever rookie of the pair stated grumpily as he pulled a thread off a tear in his jacket.

"You should see a Frous-frous invasion Slick," Kay answered mildly.

"Are you ever gonna cut it with the nicknames?" Jay whined.

"When ya grow up." Kay countered.

__

Ding.

"Time to report to the Z-Man," Jay groaned heading off the elevator behind his experienced partner.

"That's the way it's done." Kay said as they headed through the main floor.

"THERE HE IS!" an irritated female voice shouted from the entrance to the denaturalization room.

"Sounds like one of your fans Junoir." Kay grinned to Jay.

"No…" Jay panicked, "…it couldn't be!"

Agent Elle stormed over to her old partner and whacked him upside the head with a folder that she'd snatched from a passing paper pusher, "How dare you Neuralyze me for making one little comment about how different life was as an agent!"

Kay glared at Jay, "So _that's _what happened to Elle."

"Hey," Jay replied defensively, "she wanted to go back!"

"NO!" Elle hissed, "I WANTED to feel normal again, not give up life protecting the Earth. I never said, 'Jay please Neuralyze me and take away my right to protect humanity!'"

"Coulda fooled me," Jay muttered.

"Agent Elle?" a familiar voice asked from behind, "Welcome back to the MIB."

"Yeah thanks," Elle spun around to face her old boss, Zed, "but U already gave me the Welcome Home Speech."

"Well I think you'll be pleased to know that I'm not partnering you up with Agent Jay again." Zed chuckled. "And I think Jay will be relieved."

Jay nodded eagerly. "Got my one and only partner right here," he patted Kay on the shoulder, "Me and this dude are inseparable, the perfect team."

__

Unless Aileen drops by. thought Kay.

"Then who do I work with?" Elle inquired and was soon to regret asking.

"Agent Elle," Zed gestured over his shoulder to the rude JeeDangian that approached, "this is your new partner, meet Agent X."

"You?!" Elle gasped.

"Oh great," X muttered, "not only do I get shipped to this miserable little dust ball to protect a bunch of puny little humans but now I've got the puniest one of all for a partner."

"I'm thrilled about getting paired up with you too." Elle narrowed her eyes.

"Small ears, beady eyes, could your species get any uglier?" X complained.

"I hate you." Elle informed him.

"I think this is a match made in Heaven." Jay joked only to be silenced by death glares from both Elle and X.

"Now agents," Zed intervened, "I've got an assignment for all of you that I think'll require a lot of brain and bronze power."

"Good thing I'm loaded with both." X murmured confidently.

"Spare me." Elle faked a cough.

"This is serious agents," Zed continued, "Elle, I think it applies to you most of all. The city's got a bug problem. It's a subspecies of Edgar's. They've infested a local hotel uptown and are treating the guests like a human buffet. I want the four of you to span out in that building and do some high tech exterminating. Remember, bugs of any alien species are dangerous. And these are hungry. Watch each other's backs and report in if you run into any trouble. Is that understood?"

"Affirmative." Kay answered, "Time to weed out the roaches."

"Bout time we got a good case." Jay threw in.

"Figures a bunch of bugs would want to invest this disgusting planet." X jeered.

Elle elbowed him in the side, "I say we use bat boy here as bait."

"I'm sure they'd rather nibble on trash like you." X countered.

Before a heated argument could begin Kay and Jay hustled the two bickering agents back down to the garage. It was going to be a _long _37 hour day.

________________________________________________________________________

*Not bad for a movie and series crossover fic huh? Review and let me know what ya think. I'll try and update this and my other fics soon.*


	2. Extermination

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The X-Citing Entry Syndrome

Part Two: Extermination

Inside the lab Dr. Zeeltor hummed a cheery tune while his pet bacteria Lucy roared from her petri dish nearby. The good doctor had already settled into his new laboratory and was happily tinkering with a new device for the agents to field test. 

"They should be down here any minute now Lucy," he informed his pet.

Sure enough, the agents approached his counter, the Jee'Dangian he'd traveled with arguing with his new human partner. Zeeltor found it particularly funny that X had been partnered with a female after having grumbled the whole way about getting paired with an incompetent male.

"Ah agents, glad to see you could make it," Zeeltor exclaimed, "And just in time too. I've just finished my latest invention. I call it the Bug Zapper!" Zeeltor proudly held up a miniature ray gun which resembled a weapon off a typical cheesy sci-fi show.

"Hmph, dude isn't too original is he?" Jay muttered to Kay.

"Originality's overrated," Kay replied, "what matters is effectiveness."

Elle and X were still locked in their argument over X's opinion of humans and their law enforcing methods.

"We can't just disintegrate everyone who breaks a law X!" Elle shouted, "The Alien Rights Commission would slap us with so many suits that we'd have interstellar wars with every planet within ten light-years of Earth!" 

"In the JeeDang Galaxy we know how to handle criminal scum," X insisted, "show some backbone and keep the criminal element in check."

"Show stupidity and get thrown in a rival planet's prison." Elle countered.

"Do you two mind?" Jay interrupted, "We're kind of on a case right now."

Elle spun around on her heel and poked Jay in the chest as she spoke, "Don't even get me started on you Flashy!"

"Humans are so melodramatic." X stated.

"Ahem," Zeeltor intervened, "to operate the Bug Zapper you must first choose a setting then use the eye scope on top to aim, figure in your rage, and-" 

"And ZAP!" Jay concluded, "No more bug problem."

"Uh, something like that, yes Agent Jay." the doctor nodded.

"I think we grasp the concept," Kay stated, "Time to try this weapon out. C'mon agents, we've got exterminating to do."

******

Inside the hotel a maid was preparing to clean out Room 409. She hated working on this floor, it was rumored to be haunted or something. Personnel and guests went up here and never came back. But then again, those were only rumors…right?

She entered leaving her cart just outside the door. Taking out a rag and some furniture polish she started dusting the chest of drawers and kitchenette counter. 

A sudden noise from the bathroom caught her attention. "H-hello?" she called, "I-is someone in there?"

There wasn't supposed to be anyone in this room. In fact, she was supposed to be cleaning it up for the next occupants that wouldn't arrive until later that evening.

Cautiously she turned the handle to the bathroom door and sighed with relief when she found the room empty. The trashcan beneath the sink had overturned, "Darn things are always turning over." she mumbled to herself.

As she was putting it back in place a shadow fell over her back. Eyes wide she reluctantly turned around…

…and **_screamed_**!

******

Five minutes later the hotel manager came rushing off the elevator, "Ms. Ermano? Are you alright?" he called as he entered the opened room, "The guests below heard screaming and-"

He paused upon entering the bathroom. There were obvious signs of a struggle. A torn shower curtain, scattered trash, and a fully unrolled roll of toilet paper, even the complimentary soaps had been scattered about the floor. "Oh dear."

The manager continued to search the room without any luck. Ms. Ermano was nowhere to be found. In fact, the only thing he _did_ manage to find was a can of furniture polish behind the toilet bowl.

******

The scene was virtually the same when the agents entered to investigate the latest bug attack. Kay picked up the polish and studied the scratches on the side.

"Looks like she used this as a defense," he surmised, "bugs must've pried it right out of her hand."

"Talk about viscous." Jay mumbled.

Elle and X were inspecting the rest of the room. "These bugs might actually be of a more intelligent breed than Edgar's." Elle suggested, "It was like they knew the maid's schedule and were laying in wait of her approach."

"Hmph," X scoffed, "like it's _hard_ to outsmart a human."

"You wanna find out just how hard Cowboy?" Elle threatened narrowing her 'beady' eyes at her partner.

"Don't get cute with me Little Ears," X smirked, "I'm not above using you for bug bait. The way I hear it, you're a delicacy to them."

Elle's eyes widened, only one way X would know about that. "JAY…!"

"What'd ya do now Junior?" Kay asked cocking an eyebrow.

"No telling," Jay gulped. Elle was going to kill him before the week was over, he just knew it.

Elle was stomping past the open door towards the bathroom when she spotted a bug rushing past. "Kay! Jay! Bug making a break for it!"

Elle darted out the door after the alien with Kay and Jay close behind. X was still in the back of the room scoffing at the bizarre articles listed on the front of one of the human magazines by the television. His large ears picked up on the commotion even beneath his human mask and sent him off in pursuit of his elusive partner.

The bug tore down the narrow hallway towards the window at the end with the four agents closing in. He wasn't going to let some puny MIBs take him down. It was bad enough that they'd ruined his meal plans. Why did Uvark always get to pig out just before the authorities showed up?

"Freeze!" Elle shouted pulling out her icer. "MIB!"

"Like I didn't know that." the bug hissed over his shoulder, he was almost home free now, the window was less than a few yards away.

Elle fired and froze the glass. "You're trapped vermin, give up!"

"How'd you know my name?" the bug questioned turning around, it was then that he got a good look at her. "You're that chick that offed Edgar!"

"News travels fast among galactic roach colonies huh?" Elle smirked.

"Yeah," the bug--Vermin--unhunched himself to stand at his full height (eight feet), "now let's see how you like getting squashed!"

"Don't try it garbage eater," Kay warned aiming his gun at the pest.

"Yeah ya overgrown centipede," Jay added, "we're about to book ya on a one way trip to the Depclap 5 maximum security prison where the roaches check in but they don't check out."

Vermin rolled his eyes. "Where do you humans come up with these clichés?"

The bug whipped his tail around disarming the agents and piercing Jay's hand with his stinger. "OW!" Jay screamed dropping the Noisy Cricket.

"That's gonna leave a mark." Kay responded glancing at where his weapon had been knocked down a laundry chute.

Elle started backing away wishing her icer hadn't fallen so close to Vermin's four feet. "Um, I'm sensing the need for some backup here guys."

"Love to help ya Elle but we're all about to become bug chow." Jay panicked.

Vermin reared his form back to chomp down on Elle but just as he lunged forward a large blast sent him busting into bits splattering his guts all over the stunned blonde.

Whipping around all three agents spotted X blowing the smoke away from the barrel of the Bug Zapper. "This thing works pretty well." he stated cockily.

Wiping the green goo from her face Elle flew towards her partner, "Could you cut it any closer?!"

"Just wanted to see ya sweat a little." X snickered, "That'll teach you to go running off without alerting your partner first."

Elle was about to strangle him when Kay and Jay held her back. "Let me go! I'll show him protocol!!"

"No time for that now Elle," Kay insisted, "Vermin's history but he's got a whole swarm of bugs on this level ready to avenge him. It's time we split up."

"I'm sticking with you Kay." Jay said quickly, he knew he didn't stand a chance of surviving this case with an armed and angry ex-partner nearby.

"Great, stick me with Ms. Moody." X grumbled.

"You're partners X," Kay let Elle go and stared at them both as if daring them to try something, "you two had better get used to working together. You're all you've got in the field."

"Did you hear something?" Jay suddenly asked.

"Sounded like a cart overturning, we'd better head back and check it out." Kay suggested, "Elle and X, you two head down the other hall and do some pest control on that end. Zed's gonna want a full report on our progress soon. I don't intend to disappoint him."

Elle and X nodded and grudgingly trudged down the hall in the direction Kay had specified. "You just wait until you're the prey," Elle whispered to X, "I'll show you what a real close call is like."

X yawned and rounded the corner, "Are you going to make these empty human threats a part of every case we go on?"

As their bickering continued Uvark peered out from behind the potted plant where he'd witnessed Vermin's demise. The MIB would pay for exterminating his buddy. And right before lunch too! 'Hm…lunch, maybe Vermin's death wasn't a total loss.' Uvark thought slyly, 'He did manage to attract some very interesting dishes before he _split_.'

________________________________________________________________________

*There's part 2, sorry it took so long. Writer's block kept getting in the way of my creativity. Don't ya hate it when that happens? Reviews are encouraged! ^_^ *


	3. Who's Hunting Who?

The X-Citing Entry Syndrome  
  
Part Three: Who's Hunting Who?  
  
If there's one thing more dangerous than a deranged Bug out to destroy the human race, it's an army of Bugs intent on devouring the population of New York City. Uvark was hostile all right but a pushover compared to his pals lurking behind the woodwork. So while Uvark stalked after the feuding Elle and X, Kay and Jay were wandering off into aliens' stronghold.  
  
Jay walked up to the overturned cart near the end of the hall. "Well, whoever bumped into this laundry hamper on wheels is gone now."  
  
"Wouldn't count on that Slick." Kay warned cautiously. He really wished that he hadn't lost his gun.  
  
A shadowed figure darted behind the pair and slammed the door shut as it entered Room 414. The agents spun around (Jay being the only one armed with his Noisy Cricket), "Who's there?!" the younger MIB demanded.  
  
"Not there," Kay corrected as he twisted the doorknob of the hotel room, "in here."  
  
Jay tugged at his collar with his free hand, "Y-yeah, right Kay, I knew that."  
  
A low hiss emerged from somewhere in the darkness of the dim room as the partners crept inside. Kay was getting a bad feeling about this, and if there was one thing that he'd learned in all his years as an MIB agent (something no Neuralyzer could make him forget) it was that a good agent should always trust his gut.  
  
"I don't see anything." Jay whispered, his finger twitching uneasily on the trigger of his weapon.  
  
"That's the problem," Kay stated, "the Bugs don't want us to see anything, it's a trap."  
  
"Very clever---Agent Kay." a gruff voice unexpectedly remarked.  
  
Spinning around Jay nervously fired at the coat closet. Kay waited a few seconds then opened the door. "Congratulations kid, you've saved the world from an army of plastic hangers."  
  
"B-but," Jay protested, "where'd it go? I mean, I heard that thing's voice coming from right behind that door. You heard it too, right??"  
  
The more experienced agent pointed to a hole in the side of the closet, "There's all kinds of Bugs in the universe Jay, these kind just happen to be skilled at tunneling through walls."  
  
"Yeah well these termites are getting on my last nerve." Jay mumbled, "C'mon out and fight like men!"  
  
Beneath the kitchen's bar Oomparf turned to the colony's leader, "Want me to break this rookie in half Bletch?"  
  
"No," the other Bug-of a considerably larger stature-answered, "just wait for it Oomparf. Vermin pierced that human with his stinger. The poison's gonna take effect on the worthless biped soon."  
  
"What about Agent Kay?" Yenn growled as she watched the two MIBs poke around the room, "He knows too much about our species and his trigger happy partner almost disintegrated me with that puny pistol of his!"  
  
"Don't worry about it Yenn," Bletch seemed unfazed by the close call of his comrade, "Kay will be too busy rushing his partner back to headquarters to uncover our little army."  
  
"Besides," Oomparf began sniggering, "these puny humans still think we're just here to feed off the hotel guests."  
  
A shot through the cabinets shut the pesky aliens' traps. "Curse your stupid yapping Oomparf!" Yenn snarled, "You've led them right to us!"  
  
Jay grinned widely as he prepared to fire a second shot, "Like shootin' bugs in a barrel."  
  
"Don't get overconfident Junior," Kay grabbed his communicator and flipped open its cover, "Just keep 'em cornered until Elle and X get here with the Bug Zapper."  
  
"Will do partner," Jay turned his attention back to the three Bugs emerging from beneath the bar, "Attention alien scum, you have the right to remain, anything you say can and will get you exterminated."  
  
******  
  
Another hall down Elle and X were warily making their way towards the stairwell, checking rooms for pest problems as they went. After stepping out of yet another empty hotel suite the cranky partners were mere seconds away from being at each others' throats yet again.  
  
Agent X held the Bug Zapper tightly in his grasp, agitated by the fact that he'd only been able to fire it once. "It's quiet out here, too quiet."  
  
"Oh please," Elle rolled her eyes and purposefully lagged behind.  
  
"What?!" X asked.  
  
"I can't believe that they brought me back into the MIB just to stick me with a human-hating hothead like you." the blonde grumbled.  
  
"Better stick close to this hothead Little Ears," the JeeDangian chuckled, "last time you wandered off you were nearly eaten by an overgrown cockroach."  
  
"I didn't wander off!" Elle snapped, "I was doing my job while you stayed behind to scoff at magazine articles!"  
  
X just huffed to himself, "Humans, can never admit when they're wrong."  
  
Elle prayed for the strength not to wring her partner's big green neck as she absentmindedly let the icer drop to her side.  
  
Uvark eyed the pair hungrily from his stance on the ceiling. His species never really did care much for the taste of JeeDangians but this poorly disguised MIB had ticked him off just enough by rescuing the blonde so that he was willing to stomach the bland taste. Besides, thanks to these inferior meddlers his best buddy Vermin was just a smear on the windshield of life. And now he was see to it that these goody-goods paid!  
  
X tried the knob of the last door on the hall. "Locked," he sneered, "looks like we'll just have to bust our way in."  
  
"Forget it Cowboy," Elle held up a scanner and waved it over the door, "I'm not picking up any signs of extraterrestrial lifeforms in the room."  
  
"Ph, you humans and your substandard technology," X took a few steps back and prepared to deliver a kick to the door, "back in the JeeDang Galaxy we rely on action not gadgets to catch the criminal scum."  
  
"You're going to blow our cover with your pea brained cop act," Elle sighed. She could hear the lecture from Zed now.  
  
"Heh, watch and learn," the JeeDangian retorted.  
  
A happy distraction from X's lunacy came in the form of a beeping communicator. Agent Elle gladly answered as X proceeded to discover the durability of a thick hardwood door. "Elle here, what's the problem?"  
  
Kay raised an eyebrow when a sudden "OW!!!" followed by a string of alien curses resounded over the line. Shaking his head as Elle's image smirked at someone in the background (no doubt the arrogant Agent X) he spoke, "Jay and I have cornered three of the top bugs, including their leader. The kid's holding them at bay with his Noisy Cricket but the Bug Zapper would be a bit more persuasive in this situation."  
  
"Right," Elle nodded preparing to close off the link, "we'll be there as soon as X decides to stop making a fool of himself."  
  
"I HEARD THAT!" the debased alien was clutching his foot before a dented door.  
  
Uvark had to bite down on his lower jaw just to stop from laughing hysterically at the bumbling showoff. It wasn't often that his dinner provided him with a show.  
  
"Stop the sobbin' you big baby, I told you breaking down the door was a bad idea." Elle felt embarrassed just watching as X hopped forward on one foot to counter her.  
  
"Oh yeah, well if you weren't chatting away on your communicator then maybe we could've cornered some perps of our own by now!"  
  
"Don't blame me for your incompetence X!" Elle shot back, "Just because you weren't the first one to nab a bug doesn't mean you get to take it out on me!"  
  
"I knew I should've stayed back on my own planet." X continued to rant, "At least back home we had Peacekeepers who knew how to do their job right and use muscle instead of relying on machines to handle things!"  
  
"I think those muscles of yours have crushed your brain! When I say there's nothing hiding in a room then there's no reason to break into it!" Elle couldn't believe how childish X was being about all this, and she'd thought Jay was immature.  
  
"Well if you're so sure that you're a better agent than me why don't we just put your little theory to the test?" her partner suggested.  
  
"Fine by me!" Elle agreed.  
  
"Good!" X exclaimed, "You go ahead and play with your little scientific toys and I'll stay right here and solve this case!"  
  
Unable to stand there another minute and listen to her partner's idiotic ramblings Elle turned on her heel and stormed off towards Kay and Jay's last location. She'd show that conceited, big eared, showoff a thing or too about real investigating. Maybe then Zed would assign her a new partner with a little more manners and a lot less mouth!  
  
'What's this?' Uvark thought interestedly to himself, 'Looks like my rations have just been cut in half. Oh well, at least she left me the big guy. And once I've finished with the alien I can follow Blondie back to the all-you-can-eat human buffet!'  
  
X watched, fuming, as he annoying beady eyed partner rounded the corner. 'Well good riddance! Now I can handle this case MY way. No humans, just me and a few soon to be zapped bugs.'  
  
Testing the pain of his foot as he applied weight to it he decided that he'd be able to walk on it again. He ignored the slight throbbing that accompanied each step, grudgingly thinking to himself that maybe kicking the door down had been a dumb idea. He'd never tell Elle of course, she was already too convinced of the accurancy of her own observations.  
  
After a split second of deliberation X decided that any bugs on the hallway must've been scared down the stairwell when they sensed a professional peacekeeper approaching. Sure he looked like a weak little human now, but Bugs would be able to smell the difference, and he knew that they weren't particularly interested in chomping down on JeeDangians. Bugs would much rather eat a disgusting human, just further proof of their poor taste in meals.  
  
But no sooner had X opened the metal door leading down to the next level then he was tackled from above by said 'scared Bug'.  
  
"AAHHH!!!"  
  
******  
  
Bletch drummed his fingers impatiently on the countertop, staring at the agent with the raised weapon. Oomparf and Yenn exchanged puzzled glances as Agent Kay checked his watch.  
  
"Um." Jay fought off the urge to drop his numbing arms, ".you sure Elle and X said they were coming with that Bug Zapper?"  
  
"That's what Elle said Slick," Kay answered with a hint of agitation in his voice, if those two were somewhere down the hallway deep in an argument again he'd personally see to it that Zed sent them to a counseling session with Agent Quirk.  
  
A few drops of sweat rolled down Jay's brow as he struggled against his blurring vision to hold the Noisy Cricket steady. He wasn't fortunate enough to have his struggles go unnoticed. Bletch was watching with eager anticipation of what was soon to come.  
  
With a hint of annoyance Kay pulled out his communicator again and pressed down a few keys (for the second time). Jay shifted in place, 'Is it hot in here or is it just me?'  
  
Oomparf shook with eagerness as he realized that the poison was taking full effect. "Easy," Bletch said with a low growl as Jay raked one sleeve over his forehead, "don't make a move just yet."  
  
Yenn gave a toothy smile while Agent Kay frowned at his communicator's blank screen, 'Now who's dropping like flies?'  
  
Snapping the cover closed on the device Kay suppressed a groan before feeling a set of cold eyes fixated on him. Looking up to meet Yenn's gaze he saw the Bug shift her sights in Jay's direction.  
  
THUD!  
  
Kay turned to find his partner sprawled out unconscious on the floor with the Noisy Cricket still held loosely in his hands.  
  
"NOW!" Bletch shouted.  
  
Kay dove for the weapon as the three Bugs leapt over the countertop and sprang for the agents.  
  
"How's your partner like Vermin's poison Kay?" Yenn cackled grabbing the elder agent by the collar and slinging him back against the dresser.  
  
"Wonder if it'll ruin his taste?" Oomparf questioned.  
  
"One way to find out," Bletch lifted Jay up by the back of his jacket and prepared to devour the knocked out agent. But a blast from Elle's icer sent him crashing into Oomparf.  
  
Yenn spun around to see the blonde agent with her weapon held high, "Hands up or chill out!"  
  
"Where's your little partner?" Yenn chided refusing to comply, "I thought he had a bigger gun?"  
  
"This icer's got more than enough firepower to take you out." Elle informed her.  
  
"You may have squished Edgar but my breed's got a much tougher exoskeleton human," Yenn raised her stinger high to strike.  
  
"Uh.Yenn?" Oomparf cried uneasily from the floor.  
  
"WHAT?!" but once she'd glanced back at her fellow insect Yenn noted the problem. Bletch had been turned into the universe's ugliest ice sculpture and had Oomparf pinned under him. "Oh great."  
  
With a grin Elle spoke, "Looks like it's just you and me."  
  
"And me." Kay grabbed the Noisy Cricket and aimed it at the remaining Bug.  
  
"With an aggravated cry of rage Yenn sent a barrage of nearby furniture and decorative items flying around the room. As the agents dunked out of the way Yenn shoved Bletch off of Oomparf and the two hauled their leader out through the balcony.  
  
Once the debris had stopped soaring throughout the room the two conscious agents got to their feet again. "What happened to Jay?" Elle inquired as she regarded the sweating agent laid out on the floor.  
  
"Vermin's stinger left some poison in his bloodstream." Kay answered. "Where's X?"  
  
"X is off playing Cowboy." Elle grumbled, "Seems he'd rather be a JeeDangian Peacekeeper than a MIB agent."  
  
"We can't just leave him behind," Kay decided, "I'm taking Jay back to Zeeltor's lab; you go find X and meet us back at Headquarters. Use the communicator if you run across a Bug."  
  
"I think they're preoccupied with thawing out their leader." Elle remarked grudgingly heading out to find her stubborn partner.  
  
While Kay dragged Jay into the elevator Elle trudged down the hallway where'd she'd left X who'd literally been 'hopping mad'.  
  
She gasped at what she saw at the end of the hallway, a large gaping hole in the side of the building. "X!" rushing over to the opening she found it was actually a tunnel. "So this is how the Bugs have been moving around this level without being detected."  
  
Flipping open the communicator she was about to call Kay back upstairs when she heard a faint cry echoing through the tunnel. "Help!"  
  
'X?' the Bug hadn't devoured her partner yet? With the faint (and surprising) hope that X might still be alive she wriggled up a little ways into the tunnel and called out, "X?! Are you all right?!"  
  
"Help!" the cry sounded even more distant now, "Little Ears, help me!"  
  
'That's gotta be X.' Elle concluded. Forgetting about contacting Kay she tucked the device back into her jacket and crawled deeper into the tunnel, intent on rescuing her partner. ________________________________________________________________________  
  
*I know, I know---it's been forever since I've updated this. Over half a year in fact. But I won't let the story die. So keep reading and reviewing cause I finally got some time to update! ^_^ And besides.if X gets rescued and nobody's around to read about it, will Elle ever get to rub it in?* 


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